7.11.09

& this is how my speech goes..HonestScrap

Aliyah nominated me for the "Honest Scrap" award. **does victory dance** Thanks mama. Now lets get into it

The Honest Scrap Award Rules
1. Present the award to seven bloggers whose blogs you find brilliant in content and/or design or who have encouraged you.
2. Tell those seven people that you have given them the Honest Scrap Award.
3. Share ten honest things about yourself.

im gonna nominate:
Trey
Landre
Sergio Wonder & Co.
Christian
Chantale
&
Ashley

**shit. i only have 6 i can really give that to**


Now, ten honest things about me:
1. i always got picked on and was usually the underdog growing up. i remember back in kindergarten this 1 girl said she didnt wanna be my friend anymore cuz my hair wasnt long like hers. & i was always making the honor roll and this 1 time after a lil ceremony i got jumped while walking home & these boys broke my little trophy.

2. i dont like three out of my seven brothers & sisters just because i feel they're fake to the highest level. i purposely dont give them the time of day when they try to come in my life cuz i know its not sincere & im fine w/o em. i know thats bad cuz fam is fam but i dont even see em like they're my family. they havent been in my life since forever & a day so im good.

3. sometimes i blatantly lie to my parents about what im gonna be doing & with who. i know its wrong but fact of the matter is they make the biggest deals about the smallest shit. if it were up to them id probably be living in a bubble. life is too short for me to be worrying about all the negative things that can potentially occur when i walk out of the house. if its my time to go, its my time. whether im in the house or not. feel me? so i try & live like every day is my last cuz for all i know, it is.

4. my biggest fears include never finding that "one". i guess my "soul mate" or whatever. being abandoned. dying before i accomplish all that i want to accomplish & being forgotten when i die. im petrified of that cuz if once i die im forgotten, its as if i was never here to begin with. i wanna leave behind a legacy so i'll never really be gone.

5. im just now beginning to be comfortable being with a black man as far as a relationship or anything sexual goes. im not prejudice against em or anything but growing up they caused me the most grief and belittled me the most so in the past i was always hesitant to be with them for fear of experiencing all those feelings again & feeling like they'll never accept me.

6. i cant stand when a dude wants head but wont return the favor. nigga this is not a one way street. & i hate when girls act like sucking dick is the most disgusting thing in the world, then they go home & get on their knees, or however they choose the handle it. dont be a hypocrite. cant respect that.

7. i love reading but i never have time for it anymore. i used to carry a book everywhere. the bathroom, dinner table, bed. i always had my head in one. i remember when there was nothing better than cuddling up with a good book & getting lost in the words. i miss that.

8. you can usually find me with a pair of headphones in my ears. i listen to everything from Lupe to Sugarland to Beethoven to Cyndi Lauper. music is essential

9. im a walking contradiction. im seriously silly & speak with honest sarcasm

10. im doing big things & have even bigger ambitions. & i honestly feel like if i dont reach self-actualization i will have failed life. period. i think thats one of the reasons why i hustle so hard now. failure is not an option of mine.

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